Dad Humour

Knock knock
Who's there?
Tank!
Tank who?
You're welcome!

I was confused as to why I was hearing music coming from my printer.

I then realised the paper was jamming!

In which country does it rain sheep?

Most people have heard of Carl Marx, but few know of his sister Onya, an Olympic runner. Her name is still mentioned at the start of every race.

Does refusing to go to the gym count as resistance training?

Me: I’m having a great day apart from Newpussycat...

Friend: What’s Newpussycat?

Me: Whoaaah whoaaah whoooaaaah

What do you call a wolf that knows what's going on?

Why did the orange stop half way up the hill?

I made the mistake of using dog shampoo and now I feel like such a good boy…

I broke up with a girl once because she wouldn't stop counting.

i wonder what she's up to now?

Two days into my diet and I’ve gotten all the junk food out of the house...it was delicious!

Someone ripped the 5th month out of my calendar.

I'm dismayed…

I always knock on the fridge before I open it...

Just in case there’s a salad dressing...

How do pigs communicate?

My mate quit his job at BMW.
Of course he gave no indication he was leaving.