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Dad Humour

Mike
 Mike
(@mike)
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Joined: 9 months ago
Posts: 1437
Topic starter  

I asked the doctor if I could administer my own anaesthetic... He said go ahead, knock yourself out!


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Mike
 Mike
(@mike)
Noble Member
Joined: 9 months ago
Posts: 1437
Topic starter  

I put my sheet and doona (duvet) cover in the washing machine for a death match to see which one swallows the other.


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Mike
 Mike
(@mike)
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Joined: 9 months ago
Posts: 1437
Topic starter  

Did you hear about the woman caught by police with drugs in her bra? They said it was the largest bust ever.


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Mike
 Mike
(@mike)
Noble Member
Joined: 9 months ago
Posts: 1437
Topic starter  

Why does the Norway navy have barcodes on the side of their ships?

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Answer
So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian


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Mike
 Mike
(@mike)
Noble Member
Joined: 9 months ago
Posts: 1437
Topic starter  

I received a flyer on anger management the other day.

I lost it.


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Mike
 Mike
(@mike)
Noble Member
Joined: 9 months ago
Posts: 1437
Topic starter  

Why did the electrician fall in love with every girl he met?

Spoiler
Answer
Because he couldn't resistor


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Mike
 Mike
(@mike)
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Joined: 9 months ago
Posts: 1437
Topic starter  

What do you call a sleepwalking nun?

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Answer
A roamin’ catholic…


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Mike
 Mike
(@mike)
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Joined: 9 months ago
Posts: 1437
Topic starter  

I’m super friendly with 25 letters of the alphabet.

I just don’t know why.


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Mike
 Mike
(@mike)
Noble Member
Joined: 9 months ago
Posts: 1437
Topic starter  

Two antennas got married. The wedding was ok.

But the reception was incredible.


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Mike
 Mike
(@mike)
Noble Member
Joined: 9 months ago
Posts: 1437
Topic starter  

I'd just like to thank my English teacher for defining the word ‘many’ for me.

It means a lot.


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Mike
 Mike
(@mike)
Noble Member
Joined: 9 months ago
Posts: 1437
Topic starter  

What do you call a laughing motorcycle?

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Answer
A Yamahahaha


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Mike
 Mike
(@mike)
Noble Member
Joined: 9 months ago
Posts: 1437
Topic starter  

What type of bees produce milk?

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Answer
Boobees


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LoganR21
(@loganr21)
Honorable Member
Joined: 8 months ago
Posts: 453
 

@mike I hear they’re kind of scary too 😂😅

Keep steering the right path


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Mike
 Mike
(@mike)
Noble Member
Joined: 9 months ago
Posts: 1437
Topic starter  

Not to brag, but I have this incredible talent in predicting what’s inside a wrapped present.

It’s a gift.


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Mike
 Mike
(@mike)
Noble Member
Joined: 9 months ago
Posts: 1437
Topic starter  

Nurse: Theres a man in the waiting room who thinks hes invisible, what should I tell him?

Doctor: tell him I cant see him today


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