Wests Tigers star Jackson Hastings has opened up on players’ struggles inside the four walls at Concord as the side limps home in one of the worst seasons in club history.
The Tigers copped their biggest loss in club history last weekend when they were annihilated by the Roosters 72-6.
It ignited ugly scenes at the SCG with Tigers players abused by their own fans as they left the field, while Nu Brown shared an emotional post on social media.
“Last weekend made me realise how hard this game is to play. Not just the physical aspect but the mental side of it too,” Nu said.
“It was probably the first time in a long time I felt like there were little cracks into my wellbeing and mindset. People screaming at you, you suck! Voices in my own head doubting my ability. Comments saying you’re useless.
“I cried that night because I let myself and my loved ones down. I think sometimes people forget that athletes are humans as well.”
Hastings is recovering from a broken leg and watched the game against his former club from home, admitting it was brutal seeing his teammates get thrashed.
“I know what a lot of the boys have gone through this year mentally,” Hastings told the Fox League Podcast.
“We’re getting beat every week and in the media and things like that and then obviously sitting at the bottom of the ladder trying to avoid the spoon, you take your own mind away from yourself and you think about the individuals that are actually playing.
“Yes it hurts me and the fans and the people watching, but the actual impact it has when you’re on the field and how demoralising that is, it’s pretty hard to watch.”
Hastings revealed he walked into distressing scenes at training on Monday and said he wished he’d played in the record loss to share their pain.
“Going in just seeing people really upset really hurt me,” Hastings said.
“I just wish I was out there, I would rather experience that on the field knowing I felt the pain of what my teammates are feeling rather than sitting at home because it’s easy to walk around and go ‘I wasn’t involved in that’.
“Obviously you’re a part of the club but it’s easy to go ‘well I didn’t miss a tackle’, but you know and you’ve been on the end of stuff like that before so it really, really hurt me deep down to see people you care about and have witnessed go through a lot of pain this year, go through that.”
Hastings praised Brown for having the courage to express his feelings despite the stigma it can sometimes carry.
“We’ve dealt with this mental health issue for a while now, but he just expressed himself in a way that I don’t think too many people would,” Hastings said.
“Fair play to him for showing that side of what a footballer is these days because usually you get told to harden up and move on but he expressed himself in a way that I haven’t seen before and gave fans an insight into we don’t just play to get paid, it means a hell of a lot to us and the result hurts the players.
“I feel like he spoke on behalf of everyone. He actually wrote he cried and how upset he was by losing by that far and athletes aren’t just athletes, they’re humans as well.
“Not just Nu but even the boys that weren’t playing feel like we let everyone down, it’s embarrassing for all of us, the coaching staff (too).
“Our fans are demanding success and they deserve it, they’ve broken the membership record this year for a team that’s coming dead last, it’s a pretty impressive effort.
Full credit to Nu for speaking out, we’re trying to break that stigma as a whole, we all get told to be tough and not show your emotion but it’s a pretty brave effort from him.
“That doesn’t take away from the fact that we need to be better as a club and start putting in some good performances and not conceding as many points.”
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Normally I get all the boys ribbing me for losing another game every week, but after last weeks record smashing, not one of them said a word to me. I don't know if they feel sorry for me or whether they just couldn't be bothered any more ?
