Dad Humour

You don't need a parachute to go skydiving. You need one to go skydiving twice.

I used to have a fear of hurdles, but I got over it.

What do you call a monkey that stepped on a minefield?

What do you call a woman who's really good at darts?

Why is it that nobody ever seems to have the right amount of 'whelm'?

Do not forget to get enough food for 27 days as the shops will be shut for 12 hours over Christmas.

Not to brag, but I was alive when you could SLAM the phone down to hang up on someone.

It was spectacular.

Never did find out what the Knights in White sat in…

Thanks Mike. The Xmas crackers were horrible this year, so I made good use of the dad jokes thread. Lifesaver!!

If you understand why pizza is round and put in a square box and eaten as a triangle then there’s every chance you understand women…

Nothing tops a plain pizza 

Just sold my homing pigeon on Facebook marketplace for the 22nd time 👍

I had a pair of racing snails. I removed their shells to make them more aerodynamic, but they became sluggish. 

The next Star Wars movie will introduce Darth Vader’s annoying brother:

Aggra Vader…

A 57,000 square foot Temu warehouse in China went up in flames today.

The total loss of inventory has been estimated to be as high as $56.19 USD.